Saturday, March 16, 2024

A Disturbing Marriage With Personal Story And Fasting .

 

It is nice when i see that despite less resources and least support from government our society is evolving gradually overall .Many hard core old fashions are left behind such as keeping girls from studies or specially treating them as inferior to boys whether domestically or in outer world. Parents of today are more cooperative towards their children and more of them now prefer to follow what their kids want. Sadly rural areas are exception until now and children are still considered as slave or property by parents. 

I am from a small village and i have witnessed such grand pressures on parents ,mothers particularly by relatives ,aunts and uncles .My mother was really brave to refuse to being part of it and sending her daughters to school rather than surrendering before the demands of relatives for the marriage of her daughters. I keep thanking God for giving me such wise and strong mother !

As a mother i too have been facing such pressures since a decade almost from different relatives from my maternal side and from in laws as well. The demand to get their daughters for my sons as daughter in laws . If i had mind set of controlling parent it would have been true long ago. But I am not that kind of person who overshadow life around her and feel strong . My strength is my love and that is all i have . Love never controls .Our God has given us endless things but he does not like to make us his puppet but his followers who choose Him over all other things willingly by using the light he has given us as our"mind". I find this way of God so divine and fascinating ,utterly wise and liberating . It is exceptional feeling to Choose him with all my heart with my own will by using insight he has blessed me with!

I have nature to nurture my children with love and let them go to make their own way . If my love has power to keep me alive in their heart they will come to me some day to share bond i used to do with them once. And if it's not i don't need empathy or relationship made forcefully. This is not me .

It is hard to make this understand by others though. So this has been little tough to keep up with all relatives who weren't happy by this actually. Some thought i did not like their girl personally and made up the story to refuse. Some who knew me better as person thought it is my bad luck to have such simple nature and let my children go out of my hand. So many self made stories kept me hurt for long. Now all girls in the family are married well almost so things are getting bit normal . At heart i am at peace because i know i di nothing wrong .I would have love to say yes to any of them if my boys were interested but since they are part of different world now they are more interested in self growth first and marriage is not priority for them.This is nice to feel they are growing not just physically but their spirits are evolving too . But this is also little worrying that my eldest son is being late for settling down honestly. 

I brought this topic today because one of the wedding i attended recently was of kids among which one was under age . This was disturbing not for me only but for the father of underage boy and all  both side family members.


This is the newly wed couple . Girl is 19 and boy is 17 years old. Boy is son of the younger brother of hubby who is early retired from army and now work as guard at local bank. Only bread runner of the house. The boy is second child among seven and he was in 8th grade at the time of marriage. Girl is her first cousin from mother side ,divorced after one year marriage. Because their mothers are sisters so boy's mother thought she should help her poor sister and take her daughter for her son. Boy resisted a little but she convinced him with high emotional drama. Her husband wasn't agreed because he thought boy should complete study first at least. but even though she is twelve years younger than her husband her decision was final as always and marriage. All relatives received invitations with soar heart because of the age issue including me . i am unable to decide what happened was right or wrong because when think of her sister she gave her relief for sure but when think of her son she ruined his life  .
  my younger son shared his image with us yesterday when i asked for latest one , i remember  when he completed his matriculation i once asked him to quit studies and get married .It was irony to make him realize that if he wants to study further he need to put some more effort . my younger son was 16 then ,he looked at me as i was crazy and said " what did i do to hear such offer

I now realize that not him nor any of my kid has such mind set that put marriage on top of their dream list.

I don't know the future nor i want to .Specially now when things are bit  clearer all i want to live in moment i have in my hands . I did what i could do , rest i leave on my God . He is the origin of everything . Though only thing i can do is to keep praying for them as mother ! 
It is 5th of Ramadan today . Hubby me and our youngest son are fasting by the grace of God! I am really grateful to God who gave me strength to fast back finally . The mild weather is great support as well .

Thank you for bearing with me friends! 
health peace and happiness to all of you and to loved ones!






Sunday, March 10, 2024

End of The Events ,Garden Smiles And Late Response

Hey Precious Friends! 
hope and pray filling your paintings of life with best and most awesome colors available around you ! 
First i want to thank you all for your beautiful encouraging comments on my previous post .It is always so uplifting to hear from you specially when i share about my babies and their progress in life! It is fulfilling as a mother so thanks again. 
Running back and forth for attending wedding ceremonies and needless to mention preparing for them was equally exhausting ,i had to choose whether i respond to your kind comments or visit to your blogs .I don't want to miss them at all  so choose to visit blogs. It was last event yesterday so on returning home we had lunch (at evening because event took whole day and you know we don't eat highly processed meal of  events anymore) and then jumped to respond your comments on previous post .You can check if interested .

also sharing a lovely video about three forms of Intuition, lengthy though but worth watching if you have time . 



    our temps are entering in 30s ,March is pleasant airy ,partially cloudy so far . Spring is reaching to it's peak slowly :) so our garden is full of delightful blooms by the grace of God!

   it is lovely to have evening tea in front yard bench while having bit of chat 

 
   i take my one tea cup in the yard alone because hubby has to leave for office , sunshine shower upon yard and plants melts my heart with deepest gratitude .Simple joys of life are true essence of living to me honestly. taken  today at 9: 30 or so

  it was 5:30 and an hour to sunset so before changing i asked my youngest son to take one phot of us because i forgot to take photos of any event of ceremonies this time except few that i will have to look for 

     spring beauty is result of "balance" which shows utter importance of it in our life on every level ,nature has not left us unguided at all but in everything she tells something to those who care for listening 

   sometimes i wonder whether we will be able to move in Islamabad or will the garden accompany us there as well :) just rare query specially when i look at it 

   the white flower looked like shining moon among blue stars :)
 
the order and complexity of nature is strikingly thought provoking   

one more leaning bloom because of being on edge ,is this philosophy ?

   When i got out in yard at 8 am almost ,three freshly bloomed sunflowers made my day ,this was at center :)

I think enough for now as lunch is waiting to be prepared :) 
See you soon kind people !
Health ,Peace And Joy to you and to all you love!

 

Monday, March 4, 2024

Glimpses of Recent Bali Trip By Eldest Son

 Hello precious friends! 

Sorry for being late to read your blogs this week. First reason is power absence during daytime n partially during night times. Posting through phone again. Second reason is our visits to other small cities in order  to attend family weddings and khatna ceremonies. We still  have to attend three more eventsregarding this . Quite exhausting 😂

But family comes first right. Thanks to them for not insisting us to attend long night celebrations. 

Thank you so much for wishing my son birthday! Your love and support is greatest attraction in the blog land dear people ❤

Sharing some images and two videos shared by eldest son who revisited Bali  on the invitation of his childhood friend where he got his diving certificate and he can dive now anywhere around the world ! We are happy to see him achieving his dreams  ❤ 


    He wanted to come home after staying in Bali for two weeks but his  laptop broke down unfortunately which made him take leaves from office. He had to return to London to deposit laptop and get new one. That was sad but we understand his problem completely. Hope he will be able to visit in December inshallah!  

                                          Inviting view isn't it 

   Usually he starts day with shake after workoworkout but in Bali routine looks different. He told he is against being addictive so coffee or tea are rare choice 

                                             Cute !

   Underwater   world is fascinating and full of tranquillity and wonder 
  
      The origin  of organisms where tree of life sprouted  out and today it's branches touching the sky 

               The beautiful creature looks sleepy: )

   Excitement  of being part of  wonderful world 

              Hotel swimming pool probably 

   When m6 son got his certificate  for Diving ❤





   Heading to dive with team of instructors 






 THANK YOU FOR BEARING WITH ME FRIENDS. SEE YOU ALL SOON! 
GOD BLESS YOU AND LOVED ONES ❤

Tuesday, February 27, 2024

Birthday and Blooms

 My younger son celebrated his 21st birthday with his close friends at his university Campus .He shared some photos of his special day. It was satisfactory to see him having nice birthday with friends. I think i did not mention that my son has moved to hostel last year because the rented house began to show some issues which he found hard to handle alone. We all suggested  him his eldest brother particularly that hostel is better option for students due to all facilities available including cleaning service ,washing machine and kitchen supplies. He agreed and moved to the hostel where he had stayed during his first semester .He told that his birthday was celebrated twice once with university friends and the secondly with hostel mates . We wish nd prayed for his well being and good in future along all the youngster moving throughout the world amen!


    my skinny son has not restored his earlier healthy shape (sigh) back until now but he says being smart is better ,he told he makes his food once in a while and his (Fatima on left in blue embroidered dress)friend's mom also sends him delicious meals sometimes ,

                   the word written on cake meant farmer ,a name given by his best friend Hasan  

                                           such blessed memories stay in heart forever indeed 

  after dining my son went to TDF a place that offers relaxing environment for creative people ,my son and his friend created this lovely drawing which i loved because the serenity it reflects and the lush moon :)

below some more blooms for you 














    i could not write with images due to my internet is turning off after some minutes ,i think these are little better rose images i could capture 

                                                         oh the blur again ,sorry 

Thank you so much for amazing comments on previous post,i so enjoyed reading what you thought about topic ,

Words can't tell how much your support means to me dear friends! 
health peace and happiness to you all and to all you love!


 
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